Habits.... last year my husband came home with a new book which had been recommended to him. It was 'Atomic Habits', James Clear's #1 New York Times bestseller. As my husband read this book, he would occasionally share some gems with me. One thing became increasingly clear, bad habits can be hard to break and good habits can be hard to form but in an effort to live a more intentional and meaningful life, good habit forming is a worthy pursuit. In his book, Clear defines habits as "...a routine or behaviour that is performed regularly and, in many cases, automatically." James Clear reminds us that "With the same habits, you’ll end up with the same results. But with better habits, anything is possible."
"Anything is possible" Just think about that for a moment. Where does that sit with you? Do you think this is true? Could the right habits create miracles or is it just a throw away cliche?
This past weekend we had a family meeting and discussed some of our habits, some of the areas of our life which we would like to improve and some areas which are going really well. Remember, when you are living in a home with others, what they do matters to them but also to you because everything is connected. With kids, especially younger kids, I try to keep things simple and uncomplicated.
With children and habits, there are two things I know;
Motivation is usually extrinsic and intrinsic motivation may come later on. Working towards intrinsic motivation is a great goal.
Tracking goals or habits is a good measuring stick for success and improvement.
So, with those two understandings I created the "DONUT forget to......" tracking chart. There are a lot of tracking charts online but I'm using this one at the moment. We pick a goal, such as reading, making the bed or music practice. We just focus on one habit at a time right now. When children complete a task, they can colour in one of the sprinkles.
When all the sprinkles are coloured in on their sheet we are going to celebrate with the 'donut of the month' at a beachside bakery. The caveat here is that in our home, we are not a home of sweets and donuts are not something we have regularly so this is a real treat for us and a motivation for the children. You could always change the motivation factor to suit your family's needs or interests.
Making lasting and positive change can be hard but tacking habits is one way which can help you and your family to improve. In my research, I learned that most psychologists believe that it takes 2 months or 60 days for habits to form. Daily practice of actions over this time period will enable children and adults to form automatic habits. The other thing I might point out is that children learn from their examples, so consider tracking a habit yourself as a way of modelling behaviour. Uses paper tracker rather than a digital one if you are trying to model it for your children.
Here are a few other tracking charts which might help:
Evermore Paper Co.
Saturday Gift
Printabulls
What else have you used which has worked successfully with those in your home or even just with yourself? How have you tracked your progress? If you try my DONUT tracker, I'd love to know how it works for you and your home. Let me know via our socials or at home-centred@outlook.com
Finally, I really resonate with this quote, “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.” It was attributed to Aristotle and it still continues to be, however, in my research, he didn't actually write this. Instead, he wrote:
“As it is not one swallow or a fine day that makes a spring, so it is not one day or a short time that makes a man blessed and happy.” — Aristotle
The message remains the same, we are what we repeatedly do. Question then, what do you repeat? What are your habits? How do your habits bring excellence into your life?
Excellence can happen, one moment, one day at a time. For me, excellence all starts at home. Our habits are what make us, home centred.
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